“A Hamburger is warm and fragrant and juicy. A hamburger is soft and nonthreatening. It personifies the Great Mother herself who has nourished us from the beginning. A hamburger is an icon of layered circles, the circle being at once the most spiritual and the most sensual of shapes. A hamburger is companionable and faintly erotic. ” – Tom Robbins

“Anybody who doesn’t think that the best hamburger place in the world is in his home town is a sissy.” – Calvin Trillin

 

Rio Linda’s Best Burger – A Rio Linda Online reader survey

I’ve considered doing a food post about Rio Linda and Elverta for a long time now, and has always been just one of those things that I never got around to. I’ve wanted to dig into the culinary background of Rio Linda, find out where the food that we eat comes from, not physically, but historically. The more I thought about it, the more I talked myself out of it. I even spoke to my life-long friend and RLHS grad Chef Kevin Lane of the Alaska Culinary Academy about it.

I do recall lots of bbqs and just about anything on the grill. In retrospect, I am surprised that with all of the agriculture in the near vicinity, how much we relied on processed products. I guess that had more to do with the necessity of both parents working so they had less time to cook. That would also lead to my next memory of fast food eateries. Archway, Tummys, Bowinkles, Papas pizzaria.

I also wonder why no one ever harvested the friggin olives. Everyone just let them fall to the ground, turning everything purplish black, and complain about the mess. Maybe if I ever move back I’ll start doing something with them!!

Thinking of Chef Lane’s remembrance of local fast food as I sit in the Oak Tree Diner eating a bacon cheeseburger, I start to wonder… who has Rio Linda’s best burger?

I start to analyze my lunch… the bun is soft and fresh, but mass produced. The meat is cooked medium rare, perfectly pink, juicy and flavorful, but the bacon is chewy and tasteless… probably leftover from the breakfast that they absolutely excel at. The produce is super fresh! In all, it’s a good diner burger, but I’ve had better, and I’ve had better in Rio Linda… but where?

(I have to say here that I believe french fries are an essential part of the hamburger experience, and that the Oak Tree fries were some of the best I’ve had outside the Tower Cafe (the best fries on the planet, btw). Hot, not greasy, crunchy on the outside and pillow soft on the inside. Nom indeed.)

Burgers seem to be the most pervasive single food item in Rio Linda. We have Mexican restaurants, we have Chinese restaurants that have come and gone, and we have had pizza places… but the one thing that gets served almost everywhere (even at the Chinese and Pizza places) is the humble hamburger. It’s a diverse selection of places also, from Amy’s Cafe- the Chinese take-out place with a darn good burger- to the new kid on the block, and the most prevalent purveyor of burgers in the United States, McDonalds.

So, whadda you say, Rio Linda and Elverta? Is it a Bowinkle Ham-a-Neer burger that does it for you, or is it a Papa’s Pizza square burger that tickles your tonsils? Maybe it’s the classic Big Mac from the Golden Arches or something from Granite’s, under the archway?

Make your vote below, and please comment so we know what it is that gets you to vote for Rio Linda’s best burger.

(Me? My vote? Papa’s Square Burger with cheese, with a little thousand island from the salad bar to dip my burger and douse my fries. It ain’t pretty, but while everyone around me is eating mediocre pizza, I’m pleased as punch with my beefy blue-plate buddy.)

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